Health Leader - Singin' the first-day-of-school-blues

STORY BY

Melissa McDonald

As parents watch their child walk through the door to kindergarten for the first time, the backpack almost dwarfing the little body, the moment is bittersweet.

Tears, experts say, are normal.

“It is not taboo for your child to cry. It’s a normal emotion. The first day of kindergarten for your child can be exciting and a little bit scary,” says John Gasko, PhD, director of state initiatives at the Children’s Learning Institute at The University of Texas Health Science Center at Houston.

So how do you know if your child is ready for this big step into kindergarten? Here are some clues to help ease parents’ fears.

Is my child comfortable with letters and the sounds they make?
Are they familiar with books and can they pick out some of the words?
Can they say and recognize numbers one to 20 and distinguish shapes?

Gasko says it’s important for a parent to be engaged with the child’s teacher. “From day one, make sure they know about any difficulty your child may have, the experience in a school setting to-date and your expectations. If time permits, attend the open house that most schools host before the school year begins.”

“It’s going to be a bigger adjustment for children who haven’t been in a preschool setting,” says Cathy Guttentag, PhD, a child psychologist at the Children’s Learning Institute. “They may have worries as well as excitement, and no worry should be trivialized. It’s a good idea to start talking to your child about the daily routine at kindergarten. For instance, ‘The teacher will be there to help you and show you where everything is. You’ll have a desk or tables to work at, and you’ll have lunch time, playtime and rest time.’ ”

It’s important to remember that each child will respond differently to this new change.

“If your child cries, you can provide a few minutes of comfort and then help him connect with a teacher or other school staff member before you leave, so he isn't crying by himself,” Guttentag says.
“Offer him some reassuring words that show your confidence that he will have a good day and can handle the challenge.
“Let them know when you will be back to pick them up, reminding them of what the last activity of the school day will be.
If you don’t know the school schedule, ask a teacher before you leave so that your child knows when to expect you or whoever will be picking them up.”
Drive by the school and show children where you will be dropping them off and picking them up, or where they will catch the bus, Guttentag advises. A quick trip to the school will allow your child to see the playground and feel more comfortable that first day.
“You can talk about how the teacher will know it’s everyone’s first day. Tell them that the teacher knows children need help with things like finding the bathroom, and that the teacher will make sure children get to their families, the bus or an afterschool care program at the end of the day,” says Guttentag. “You don’t want a child to wonder if a parent will be able to find them. Providing this concrete information helps children feel more secure.”

Start talking now about concerns

In the weeks before kindergarten, start asking your child about her concerns. “Many parents will talk about how exciting it is to go to kindergarten, and this is great, but we also need to recognize that there may be worries or losses for the child, mixed with the excitement. I have a child heading off to kindergarten this fall,” Guttentag says. “My daughter thinks she would rather stay at the preschool she is familiar with, with teachers she knows and friends she already has. Parents should be open to children having a variety of feelings about this transition and encourage them to talk about all of those feelings, whether positive or negative.”

Another idea, Guttentag says, is to use pretend play to help prepare children emotionally for this new experience. “You can make a game out of it. You can take turns with your child pretending to be the teacher and run through a ‘day in the life of kindergarten.’ You can talk about riding the bus or mommy or daddy 'dropping you off,' working on papers, having lunch, etc. Kids will do better if they have some sense of a routine. You can try it out two or three times in the weeks leading up to school,” she says.

Guttentag also suggests reading books to your child that center on a character going to kindergarten for the first time. Here are some recommendations:

“The Kissing Hand” by Audrey Penn
“Miss Bindergarten” Gets Ready for Kindergarten by Joseph Slate
“Kindergarten Rocks!” by Katie Davis
“Franklin Goes to School” by Paulette Bourgeois
“The Berenstain Bears Go to School” by Jan and Stan Berenstain

The first few days or weeks of kindergarten will be a challenge for your child, experts say. “Kindergarten today is much more structured than 10 or even 15 years ago,” Gasko
says. “The demand on behavioral skills and maturity is much higher.”

If your child has been medically diagnosed with a special need, make sure the school is aware. Some examples of special needs are hearing and vision problems, attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) or autism. “It’s important to schedule an ARD (Admission Review and Dismissal) meeting with school staff as soon as possible. You want your child to be able to start the year off with a clear plan in place for how his needs will be met,” Guttentag says.

At the end of that first day, give your child a big hug and congratulate him or her for making it through. This is a big milestone to celebrate! Ask your child how the day went and pay
attention to body language.

“If you think your child is struggling, talk with the teacher and get help early. It’s also important that children are enjoying school,” Gasko says. “They should feel proud.”

Share your thoughts:

Send us your questions for the experts, comments or suggestions.

Last Updated: 8-7-2009

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About Dr. Gasko:

Dr. John Gasko is director of state initiatives at the Children’s Learning Institute at The University of Texas Health Science Center at Houston.

Health Tip:

Packing Bag Lunches Safely

If you pack lunches for your child to take to school, be careful that you do not accidentally expose them to foodborne illness.

Bagged lunches, especially those containing perishable foods, need to be packed and handled properly in order to keep the food safe. In general, perishable foods should not be left at room temperature for more than two hours. If left out too long, the temperature of the food can enter the danger zone where bacteria grow most rapidly, which is between 40 and 140 degrees Fahrenheit.

Below are some tips to help families pack bagged lunches safely:

Pack foods that are nonperishable and won't require refrigeration.
If you do pack perishable foods such as luncheon meats or prepackaged cheese and crackers, include a frozen gel pack or a frozen juice carton with the food in an insulated lunch bag or box.
Pack only the amount of perishable food that your child can eat at lunch.
Preparing lunches the night before and storing them in the refrigerator until you pack your child's lunchbox in the morning can help keep food cold longer the next day.
Don't reuse packaging materials such as paper or plastic bags, aluminum foil, etc. as they can contaminate other foods and cause foodborne illness. Have your child discard all used food packaging and paper bags after lunch.

Before eating lunch or snacks at school, make sure your child washes his or her hands with soap and warm water for at least 20 seconds. If your child's school does not have a handwashing program in place, encourage them to adopt a such a program, as handwashing is one of the best ways kids and parents can protect health and stop the spread of germs.